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Pearls of Wisdom: Advice from a Dead Squirrel Who Knows Everything

Enter the mystical and magical world of the internet sensation ME Pearl, the psychic squirrel deity who created the universe and longs to open it up for you!

Welcome to ME Pearl

Pearl de Wisdom loves you, in her fashion. And you love Pearl.  SURPRISE!


The recent solar flares have interfered with transmissions from beyond and have halted transmissions from PEARL de WISDOM!



Pearls of Wisdom: Advice from a Dead Squirrel Who Knows Everything

Pearls of Wisdom

Advice from Pearl de Wisdom –  a Dead Squirrel Who Knows Everything
Enter the mystical and magical world of the internet sensation ME Pearl, the psychic squirrel deity who created the universe and longs to open it up for you!

Pearl de Wisdom loves you, in her fashion.
And you love Pearl. SURPRISE!

You are to be congratulated on finding this site. This is where Pearl de Wisdom explains it all for you. When All Else Fails, ASK PEARL. Write in with your own concerns or simply read Pearl’s advice to others. It all comes to the same As The Tail Ends.

Love offerings welcome.

You will know when the time is right. Meanwhile, tell Pearl what is on your heart. Talk to ME. Pearl of Compassion who understands all things and will respond. ASK PEARL now!

Pearl de Wisdom absolves herself of any and all responsibility for whatever may go terribly terribly wrong as a result of taking her advice. Thank you for writing in and have a nice day.

Due to overwhelming popular demand, by readers who don’t have a clue what is going on here, I am including a brief temporal autobiography of ME, Pearl de Sagesse de Sabaduria.

I AM A DEAD SQUIRREL WHO KNOWS EVERYTHING and pines to share it with YOU. I lived for 10 years as a non-releasable in So. Cal, and gnawed my way through most of a Merriam-Webster’s English dictionary and around the edges of a LaRousse Spanish/French. Plus, I absorbed vast amounts of information through my 7 senses, tuned beyond anything you can yet imagine. And the rest I make up.
In short, in matters vegetable, animal and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern psychic squirrel.
Croaking only increased my power and lovability factor.
You can ASK PEARL anything
Confide in ME, Gentle Reader; unburden your soul.
Pearl wants to hear from you, NOW.
The big pink human who was my earthly caregiver and is now my channeler is, to put it kindly, a bit of an albatross.
I listen to Seth and Abraham complaining but HA!
their challenge is nothing compared to ….well,
don’t get ME started.
Just write to ME.
Every category gives you the opportunity.
Pick your favorite, or visit them all, and let’s get to know each other.


Ask Pearl de Wisdom

Pearl de Wisdom
is unavailable due to disruptions outside of our control!

Let me squirrelsplain this to you…

THIS is where you have the opportunity to find the *truth from ME, Pearl de Wisdom!

* or a facsimile thereof (because, Mesdames et Messieurs, YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH. ha hahaha hee hee ..hic hic hic, Pearl de Wisdom is sooo funny!)

Pearl de Wisdom absolves herself of any and all responsibility for whatever may go terribly terribly wrong as a result of taking her advice.

Please note that your personal privacy is of no interest to Pearl.

Thank you for writing in and have a nice day.


Pearl de Wisdom
is unavailable due to disruptions outside of our control!


  1. Nadiya

    Dear Pearl,
    What are your thoughts on skunks? I have some in my neighborhood that I would like to befriend. Any tips on making that happen?
    All the best to the Greatest Squirrel of Them All

    • MEpearl

      Skunks are known as extreme rehab. The friendliest thing you can do with most wildlife is to leave them alone.If a skunk turns their back on you, RUN.

    • Jamie Carradine

      How do we reach the Possum and Squirrel Queen? My city is killing these lovely creatures by the 1000’s and I am hoping she will join me in ending this.

      • MEpearl

        Not enough information for a meaningful reply. What city? Why? Contact the local wildlife rescue.
        We hear and appreciate your outrage. Possums and squirrels are definitely in need of more defenders.
        Just remember SQUIRRELS FIRST!!

  2. Chet

    Hi Pearl, I wanted to ask if there are other dead squirrels that you know of with hosts channeling them back into our realm

    • MEpearl

      How could you even ask? Silly human.

  3. Randy Bear

    Hello Pearl, I am perpetually irritable with everyone important in my life, how do I overcome this and change?

    • MEpearl

      Check to see if you are important in their lives before going to the trouble of changing. You’re
      Welcome. P

  4. Alek

    Pearl I am torn. I don’t know if I should move to Seattle. On one hand I love my friends and family being close to me but on the other I have a pretty cool job offer that could be a really good career opportunity. What do you think I should do?

    • MEpearl

      New friends and family await you in Seattle.
      Happy adventures!

  5. Smo

    Pearl and Georgette,

    You are a bright light in an ever increasing dark world. Thank you for everything you do ♡ Please never change

    • MEpearl

      Thank you, Smo~
      Since you clearly already have the poetry gene, allow ME to make one small suggestion: “I am a bright light in an ever darkening world.”
      That said, we can turn this around. Where does your light shine the brightest? We really want to know.
      Pearl Loves You

  6. Alek

    What up Pearl

    • MEpearl

      Ethereal antenna~

  7. Grace

    Dear Pearl,
    A squirrel lives in my wall and I want to be friends him but I also don’t want to let him in my apartment because I’m afraid my cat and the squirrel wouldn’t get along. What’s the best way to let him know that I want to be friends?

    • MEpearl

      Let the squirrel make the first overture of friendship. Be very very very patient.

  8. Pat from St Paul


    Please let Georgette know that I just saw the Ballroom Dance Party video. I am a ballroom dancer, and it just made my heart so happy!

    Thank you so much…. This just made my day!


    • MEpearl

      And you make our heart happy.
      Pearl & Co.

  9. Rhys

    Wonderous Pearl, I seek your wisdom.
    Years ago, while traviling by train with a group of friends, I witnessed something magical that I have been thinking of ever since. While passing a large feild, I saw a man sitting next to a deer waving at me. there were no houses or buildings around, and I was the only person who noticed him. Is there any chance he was trying to tell me something? or perhaps it was just a friendly exchange. regardless, that event lives in my memory forever.

    Warm Regards,

    • MEpearl

      Congratulations Rhys~You have been invited into that magical realm of interspecies understanding. Go with grace, my child.
      Pearl loves you.

  10. Dan

    Really enjoyed your opossum videos. I’ve always been fond of possums but now I’m in love with one that visits my bird feeder every night which is on my deck just outside of my door. He/she is not afraid of me at all. He just makes the soft clicking sounds and I respond by speaking in a quiet voice. We have a “thing” going on. I do look forward to his nightly visits.
    He likes bread, bananas, and pieces of hot dog. Strawberries? Not so much.
    Thank you for your videos. It’s nice to know that there are other “nuts” like me that share an affection for these misunderstood animals.

  11. Admin

    HEY! I got my book! OMG it is beautiful!!
    I am so excited!

  12. eaves

    dear pearl,

    thanks for helping me with the wood chewing last time.

    I noticed that you don’t a wikipedia page, but surely a dead squirrel who knows everything meets wikimedia’s standards of notability, right? what’s up with that?

    • MEpearl

      Control, leakyeaves, control.

    • MEpearl

      It’s a matter of control, leakyeaves~

  13. Sami

    Dear Pearl,
    What should I major in for college?

    • MEpearl


  14. mollythestressed

    Hi pearl, I came upon your videos while procrastinating my midterms, due in 30 minutes, and I have to say after finding you it was all worth it, because I have literally not be as entertained now in a long, long time.

    Thank you for your general comedy and wisdom, but I have to ask Pearl, how do you get the commitment to keep up with this? I will admit I am only 19, far younger than your past-dead self, but I yearn to at all keep up with any level of commitment to anything that of which you seem capable.



    P.S. do you miss anything about being a squirrel? I sometimes wish I was one so I just need to know if that is a smart goal to have.

    • MEpearl

      Smart? No. Not for you. I am more squirrel than ever but you may have ME confused
      with my human channeller, Georgette, who was never a squirrel. Commitment is easy when the project is fun and the rewards are plentiful.The really good rewards often come as a surprise. Stay innocent and open. Your Pal Pearl perceives that you are angry with school. Get to the bottom of that and reclaim your energy.

  15. VwolfSketches

    Hello 🙂
    My dogs (esp. Nemo) love to come bark at the squirrels who purposely come and hide behind things in my yard and in trees where only the dogs can sense them. My dogs than come out and chase them off harmlessly.
    Are my dogs and the squirrels friends?
    Best ~Vwolf

    • MEpearl


    • Lulu

      Dear Pearl,
      I had the strangest dream that I was buried alive under 20 dogs.

      What could this mean?

      Thank-you for your time,


      • MEpearl

        Goddess loves you.

  16. Liam and Molly

    Hi, Pearl!

    I was wondering if you could let us know, how’s squirrel #713? We are huge fans and just wanted to know how his leaps of faith are going.

    • MEpearl

      Wonderful question! #713 is an elder now, encouraging youngsters in their own leaps of faith, just as I encourage you in yours.
      Your Pal Pearl

  17. Molly

    Hi, Pearl!!

    It’s my friend Liam’s birthday next month, and we love watching and quoting your videos. I was wondering if you could give him any advice as he turns another year older??

    Thank you in advance, can’t wait to here from you!

    • MEpearl

      Never take second hand advice from a dead squirrel.

  18. Jameson Hilliard

    Hello Pearl,
    Over the past few weeks I have been living rough on Skid Row in Los Angeles, CA, and many of the tent-dwelling mongrels who are unfortunately my “neighbors” keep taking my belongings! These include 2 needles completely unrelated to drugs or any illegal activity, and 2 pill bottles of Viagara I use as a supplement and definitely not for sexual activities. Can you give me advice as to how I can make more friends in my homeless encampment to avoid my belongings being taken?

    Much thanks,
    Jameson Hilliard

    • MEpearl

      So your question is “How can I make more friends?”
      Answer: Kindness

  19. Morgan

    Hello Pearl,
    I have been a follower for a long time, but recently I have been feeling lost. College doesn’t feel right, should I drop out? Become more devoted? Thank you, bless.

    • MEpearl

      Hey Morgan~ Yes, become more devoted. No, don’t drop out. You need a calling, a passion, and I am here to deliver it to you.
      You are now director of development for ME Pearl Ministries. Solicit your college chums. It’s just a win win win all over the place.
      You’re welcome. P.

  20. PearlAcolyte

    Glorious Leader Pearl, where did I hide all those nuts I buried? All I can find are small trees!

    • MEpearl

      Patience, little one, patience.
      Pearl Loves You~

  21. Mahoney

    What is the meaning of life?

    • MEpearl

      First you must DECIDE what is the meaning of YOU. Then the rest of life will fall into place and you will understand as much as
      is absorbable.
      You’re welcome.
      The Pearl

  22. Wolfie

    I just bought your shirt from Zazzle. Happy new year, Pearl!

  23. Vagabond

    Dear pearl

    I keep having weird dreams about possums winning the Olympics, what does it mean?

    • MEpearl

      You are far ahead of your time, Vagabond.
      Mazel Tov!

  24. Kim from addictedtosalsa

    Salutations O supreme, sexy, sanctimonious squirrel,

    My cat bites my face. Help.

    • MEpearl

      Help with what? I don’t follow.
      Your Pal Pearl

  25. Good Vibes Gary

    O mighty Pearl, I seek your wisdom.
    How do I get rid of the rat’s nest currently situated in my car? They are not very friendly and I am too scared to tempt their tempers another time.
    Sincerely, a cowardly Gary.

    • MEpearl

      Dear Gary,
      Squatters rights. Time to get a new car.
      With Love, Pearl

  26. Valencia Ganoe

    Hello Pearl! My husband and I discovered your channel recently and I would like you to know we LOVE it! I try and watch one video per day for a delightful injection of wisdom and humor. Thank you for all that you do- these days a little fun is really needed and appreciated!

  27. Davis and Andrew

    Dear Pearl,

    There are a pair of outdoor cats in our neighborhood whom we adore. Tonight, as we were driving by the cats, we witnessed an opossum lingering near the cats. The situation seemed tense, as the cat and opossum were staring at each other, and the cat seemed poised to attack. Thankfully, the opossum left without incident.

    Can cats and opossums live together peacefully?

    We love you, Pearl!

    Andrew and Davis

    P.S We want to foster a rescue cat. Any advice?

    • MEpearl

      Possums and cats often happily share food. Be sure and provide enough. Scarcity causes tension.
      Check in with cat rescue orgs. to answer your fostering questions. Good luck.
      Your Pal, Pearl

  28. Jasper

    I was walking as a lonely cloud
    i was impressed by your beauty and kindness

    what are the requirments to became a channeler?
    to be fill with grace and wisdom ?
    to be Untroubling and untroubled?

    • MEpearl

      Be available to the message.

  29. Esmeralda

    Dear Pearl,

    I am way too old for my parents to be paying my rent, but they still do. I’ve been chasing the idea that I can make a living off being creative somehow for my whole life, but I’ve never had a plan. I get frustrated and confused by social media. There are a million people ready to tell me how to get business and page views, but I get tired of the hurdles and hide in the financial security that I am lucky to have, but ashamed to be living off of. I know it can’t last forever. I know every artist just wants to make art and doesn’t want to mess with the business side of things. I know the market is saturated. I know my aversion to technology is something I have to get over. But I’m finding it really hard to push myself to get over these things when comfort and safety are a phone call to my parents away… and the way I seem to “earn my living” these days is by being the best person I can be and kind and gentle with my aging parents. How can I change my habits for a chance at surviving with some kind of dignity in the future?

    Love and respect for your corner of the universe <3

    • MEpearl

      You’ve never had a plan because you’ve never made a plan.
      Esmeralda, MAKE a plan. It doesn’t have to be right. It just has to be real. And keep being good to your parents.
      Your Pal Pearl

  30. Marissa

    hi pearl! i’m a writer, or at least, i try to be! right now i’m in school studying to be a teacher. i think i have good ideas that I can put into book form, but i have this crippling fear of doing it wrong. i feel like i only have one shot per idea, and i’m always scared that i’m going to ruin it in the way i choose to start, so instead i just don’t write anything. i’m also constantly worried about saying the wrong thing or making the wrong choice when writing and accidentally hurting someone. it’s my dream to be able to make a living off of my books someday, but i’m not sure if it’ll ever happen. do you have any advice for me?

    • MEpearl

      Embrace mistakes! Stop being the judge of what’s right or wrong, just DO IT! What’s crippling you is being a ‘people pleaser’.
      Doing it wrong is the best education and absolutely essential to eventually getting it right. Remember, if it’s worth doing it’s worth doing wrong. Really.
      Pearl Loves You

  31. RedPanda

    Dear Pearl, you are amazing, I love your videostories. Seems you are in touch with your spirits. On the opposite of that, I cannot connect with mine. I have a talent of writing, i have huge and wild fantasy, but i cannot make myself start using them and this make me feel frustrated and sad. and more sad i feel, more impotent i become. vicious circle. Sometimes i even doubt myself, do I really have any talents? please, Pearl, give me some advice! Thank you to the moon and back.

    • MEpearl

      Dear Red Panda~ You have huge amounts of talent that are being suffocated and buried in your sad. It comes from lacking patience and faith and that will pass. For now, your job is to look for what’s beautiful and interesting. When you come across something special make a note of it. Nothing else.
      Stop thinking about using your gifts and fantasies. Be available for them to use you. Patience and Faith. You are the real thing.
      Pearl Loves You

      • RedPanda

        Thank you thousand times! <3 <3 <3

  32. Ku Ku

    Hi Pearl!

    Today I released an album. Please tell me – will it be successful?

    Thank you,

    Adam/Ku Ku

    • MEpearl

      It will be successful but not in the way you project or immediately recognize.
      Your Pal Pearl

  33. Synth

    Dites-nous: vous êtes une sorcière du niveau le plus haut, oui ?

    • MEpearl

      Vous me flattez.

  34. Sarah

    Dear Pearl,

    You are delightful and I am glad to know of you. My question is, how do I follow in your channeler’s spiritual footsteps?



    • MEpearl

      Dear Sarah,
      Following in Georgette’s spiritual footsteps is not that difficult but possibly not the best choice.
      Just be kind and watch everything fall into place.
      HOWEVER, If You want to follow in MY spiritual pawsteps then we gotta get down and dirty, be ruthless;
      do whatever it takes to be adored by the masses. It’s fun, really! You’d like it. O.K., now, take a little time to mull this over.
      The Pearl

  35. Henry Von Possum

    You helped my big brother so much last year. Now I am wondering,can you explain to humans why they should never poot with an oppsum in their lap? This younger generation….why, why, why, explain.. you are so eloquent in explaining opposum facts. Or should they just experience it for themselves??

    • MEpearl

      Sometimes you just gotta do what ya gotta do. They are more to be pitied than censured.
      Your Pal Pearl

  36. VaVa

    Dear Pearl,
    I have been feeling overwhelmed from feeling pressured by my in-laws to spend every holiday with them. What advice do you have for standing up for yourself?

    • MEpearl

      Dear VaVa, This is one of those ‘Take a deep breath and just DO IT situations. “Thank you but we have another commitment that day.”
      And stick to it. Stay strong. Just DO IT. Get a bottle of scotch and an inhaler if necessary but stay resolute.
      You’re welcome. Pearl

  37. Paj

    It’s 3.24am; I just found out about you 15 minutes ago, and I am converted.

    Please, bestow some wisdom on this poor Irish man… I seek guidance!

    • MEpearl

      Dear Poor Irish Man~
      Express with specificity.
      Yours in Love and Enlightenment~

  38. Todd Davidsom

    Hello, Pearl of Wisdom, Me Pearl.

    As of late I have been plagued by visions of alien beings, with strange and wondrous form, following me or carrying me away to places I find disorienting and hard to describe. Should I try to give them a gift or something? Is it really happening or am I just dreaming?

    Your boundless joy and ascendant wisdom are gifts to this world.


    • MEpearl

      Dear Todd~
      You ARE the gift. Just lie back and think of England.
      Your Pal Pearl

  39. Rachel

    What do you think of baby yoda?

    • MEpearl

      I don’t.

  40. Maratop

    Dearest MEPearl,
    My heart is empty but the world is full of things. How do I change my dreams accordingly? I’ve had to give up on so many goals, because with all this poverty nonsense, they’ve become unattainable. Will you give me new dreams, MEPearl?
    Thank you. -Your Devotee

    • MEpearl

      Dearest Maratop~Dreams are easy and, you are right, the world is full.
      For the next three days jot down everything you notice that makes you happy.
      Then delete those that require what you don’t have, such as $ or a high profile resume.
      The rest make up your field of dreams. Roll around in it until you find a favorite.
      For ME it’s tree dancing but we are all different. Pearl can feel the happiness awaiting you.

  41. Boomer Sprinkle

    Hi MEpearl,
    Thank you for being open and inspiring.
    I’ve noticed Opossums online using xylophones – do you think the Opossums are more musically inclined than commonly believed?
    Just like any other animal the Opossum probably needs to be taught?
    Thank you!

    • MEpearl

      Hey Boomer Sprinkle~
      If music be the food of love, play on. Opossums seem to excel at keyboard instruments but let’s not rule out the cello or kazoo. Give the joey a variety of musical options and encourage her natural preference.
      Big P

  42. Chris Red

    hello hello i love your channel now show me the way to small animal heaven! 🙂

    • MEpearl


  43. yummty possum

    O’ magnificent Pearl! I have been imbibing your wisdom for over half a year, and I am truly grateful to have found you. You’ve given me heart advice that I have taken to heart and it has helped me greatly. I love you!
    I’ve been having a bit of trouble dealing with long term stress, and I don’t wish for to affect my mood and disposition as it seems to have already.
    I know a goddess as yourself experiences naught such troubles, but if you were to, how would you deal?

    • MEpearl

      You don’t think being Goddess of the Multiverse is stressful? Scheese!
      Thank ME for funny cat videos!
      Your Pal, P

  44. Awesome Blossom the Fabulous Opposum

    I was happily living in an air conditioned room with queen size bed. Apparently, I have become too fat (2 pounds) and I have found myself living in an outdoor cage!! Mom’s friends keep saying I would make a wonderful indoor pet, but she is not budging. She refers to my poo and farts and how much trouble my diet is. I didn’t even know I was on a diet, so could you advise her of a diet that will make my poo and farts smell like flowers? If not, can you explain why I am outside and why this is better for me? A video would be helpful. I am a bit of a slow learner, and I process information better with a visual aid. Very much thank you lovely dead squirrel. I could just eat you up!!

    • MEpearl

      Because, dear Blossom, you are soon to be FREE and nothing is better than freedom, if you have the vitality for it.
      Otherwise just hang around and act needy. Mom will cave, they always do. Either way, life is good, young one. Be of good cheer.
      And remind your mom that you’ll get cleaner as you get older.
      And don’t eat dairy. It makes you fart.
      Your Pal, Pearl

  45. Miss Wiggweave

    Dear Pearl, your fans are concerned. Pearl is no longer with us, but what about Sally? Who is the woman behind the opossum — the world needs to know!

    • MEpearl

      That Sally passed years ago and was never involved with ME Pearl.
      Georgette Spelvin is alive and well and ever ready to spread the good word.
      Blessings, Pearl

  46. Oliber

    did I just unintentionally join a cult based off a dead squirrel named pearl?- Pearl have I?

    • MEpearl

      Only you and Pearl know your true intentions.
      Pearl Loves You

  47. Maria McLaughlin

    Pearl, is this guy the one I’ve been waiting for? I adore you. Xo

    • MEpearl

      One of them, yes. It will take several to fulfill your requirements. This is not unusual. Appreciate this guy for what he brings and do not expect it to be all that you seek. Be patient. You are not ready for the ‘one’ yet.
      Your Pal Pearl

  48. Tristan Henderson


    I’ve done my taxonomic research and found what I regard to be the best rodent. Though some call them squirrels, Anomalures are not closely related to Sciurids. The body of an Anomalure is far more robust and sexier. Some even have skin flaps for gliding. How do you feel not being the best rodent?

    • MEpearl

      Silly Tristan~
      Pearl loves you.

  49. Evan

    dear pearl, how does one find motivation to try hard and succeed?
    thank you for all your work

    • MEpearl

      Hi Evan~
      If you feel unmotivated to try (succeeding is a result) then perhaps you are going after the wrong thing. Get really specific about what you want, not what you think you should want but what you really DO want. It will give you a burst of energy when you think of it. Pearl believes in you.

  50. The Expert

    Hello Pearl,

    What is cinninomona?

    Thank you.

    • MEpearl

      It’s the properation of two thracknels and a grall.
      You’re welcome.

  51. Nikki

    Dear Pearl, you have changed my life and since I believe in you so much I am sure you can force my future since you are a true squirrel god. Can you give me a small prophesy of my future? Like will I travel the world? Who will I marry? Will I be successful? What does life have in store for me? I believe in you and I believe that you will have some prophesy for me

    • MEpearl

      Well, no, not really. At least not anything that I’m going to tell you. The questions you have are intended to be answered in the moment through experience. Being told the likeliest scenarios of your future would be more of a hindrance than a help. You’d just get in the way and then fate would have to make an example of you. Just take the next indicated action and, above all, be kind. Your future should unfold brilliantly. Be careful about asking for ‘spoiler alerts’. They are called that for a reason.
      Pearl Loves You~

  52. Momo

    Dear Pearl,

    I hope this reaches you well.

    I am left with an opossum after my local wildlife authorities have ejected her from their care. Although I am more than happy to accommodate the opossum, she has been staying for months and refuses to contribute to rent and household duties.

    Unfortunately, I am at the end of my wits and budget. I’m afraid I will not be able to support her, she refuses to work and spends the whole day on youtube and other internet distractions.

    I desperately seek your council, especially during these trying times.

    With love,

    • MEpearl

      Dear Momo~
      Sounds like you’ve got yourself a little diva, there. Not much to be done except accommodate her and enjoy participating in an interspecies relationship.
      You’ve been chosen.

  53. David the living raccoon

    Dearl Pear dead squirrel. Buddha has failed me. I know what I want to do in life but I don’t want to go and do it. May your words guide me outside this grey paradox.

    Regards, David.

    • MEpearl

      Maybe you failed Buddha.

  54. Corey Pickles

    Hey Pearl, do you ever get jealous of the videos with opossums your owner posts on the internet? Shouldn’t there be more squirrels?
    Love ya bunches

    • MEpearl

      My WHAT???
      Pearl, Goddess of the Universe for goodness sake.

  55. Taylor

    Dear Pearl,

    I have seen that many people have asked you questions about how to live a more enjoyable life and you have given great answers. I have a question about how to tell someone I admire deeply how much I care about them. I would like to create a greater connection with them but I am scared to show my feelings. Thank you.

    With greatest regards,

    • MEpearl

      Don’t tell them anything. Really. Don’t. Show them. Either: Ask for their help on a sincere issue where they would be a logical source of help, then let them help you. Not easy but very bonding. Or, offer them help which they appear to need and you are qualified to offer. In both cases sincerity is essential. If you can’t be absolutely sincere than don’t do it.Your Pal, Pearl

  56. MrSpider

    Hello Pearl,
    Why do we exist?


    • MEpearl

      There is no generic answer. It’s unique for everyone. Are you seeking purpose?
      It’s better than what you suspect and will be a lot more fun. Soon. Very soon.

  57. soap

    hello great and powerful pearl!

    i come seeking guidance in these times of isolation and fear. how do you suggest dealing with this covid-19 plague? you are such a light in this dark time. i hope you and your wonderful medium are safe and well. thank you dear friend.


    • MEpearl

      Dear Soap,
      Your name says it all. Keep sudsey!! And NOW is the time to dive into that project you’ve been putting off. No, not that one, the good one. The artistic one. Reveal your soul, tell your truth. There has never been a better time.
      Pearl Loves You

  58. Joshua casey

    Almighty and magnificent pearl thee world is in great in fear and turmoil!! What are we to do in such desperate times? I politely Request Guidiance great and powerful squirrel girl.

    • MEpearl

      This may be hard for you to hear but my world is not in great fear and turmoil. My world is doing just fine, better than usual with fewer humans mucking about. Until humans realize they are simply other animals entirely dependent on Gaia for their well being it will continue to go badly. Humans don’t own the earth, they share the earth with the rest of us. Sadly, most are just too dumb to get this. Probably too obvious. But it’s not to late for you, Joshua. Pray for clarity. I’ll do my best. Pearl loves you.

  59. Jose Phalan

    Your earthly caregiver was on High Maintenance! The big time! Any thoughts?

    • MEpearl

      Hello Jose~
      I, Pearl, AM the big time. And nothing requires higher maintenance than ME.
      Thank you for asking. The P.

  60. Valeria

    Pearl, was I a fool for not knowing about your existence… yet I knew there was something greater waiting for me to be in the right moment to be able to fathom its greatness and wisdom.
    Love you, your possums, and your channel! <3 <3
    P.S: Tlacuache (tlah-kwah-cheh) is opposum in spanish (Mexico).

    • MEpearl

      “Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know before you learned it.” Maya Angelou

  61. Evelyn Gabai

    Dear MEPearl: I came across your website after reading about a psychic horse named Lady Wonder — but you are an even greater wonder! I too am a squirrel rescue mommie. After 5 years I still miss my beautiful Squirrpel McLovin’, a fox sq. Just like you. Pearl, will I ever get to see him again? I miss him so much! Thanks, O Squirrelie Swamie Love Ev

    • MEpearl

      Of course you will see Squirrpel McLovin’again but don’t just wait around while there are so many of my species who need rescue and skilled care and TLC. Once you develop such skills you have a responsibility (this is your SQUIRREL talking) to DO IT. JUST DO IT! There is so much more squirrel love to be had. Throw yourself into it unreservedly and never look back. Squirrpel will meet you on the other side.
      Your Pearl

    • Ev Gabai

      Dear Pearl: I thank you for your response and bow to your squirrely wisdom! I have already done, as you advised. Love Always, Your hominid devotee, Ev

  62. Evan

    Dear Pearl,
    You are a inspiration for me and provide me joy in my depressing life and i would be remiss if I didn’t contact you. Thank you for giving my life a purpose. Pearl you are my role model.

  63. Oppossum God

    Bow down to me, as I am an Opossum >:)

    I am bigger than all squirrels and will eat you for lunch dinner and supper and brunch


  64. Ginger

    Pearl, will my baby be a boy or a girl?

    • MEpearl

      Depends on the species.

  65. Lauren

    You are my inspiration. Your poetry has given me peace. Given me solace. Continue this beautiful work

  66. Paige

    You have a beautiful voice.

  67. Richard

    I am raising 3 opossums it is very difficult how do you raise your opossums without finding them in the street because I all I can find are ghetto oposumms

    • MEpearl

      Druid Sunday School


    Greetings, great and powerful ETERNAL ME PEARL. I am MAURICE and I take the form of a patchy syphilisaurus (a dinosaur.) As a kindred deity like spirit I recognize your light and you are the only one I can turn to for guidance. I have syphilis, and I am afraid blasphemous acts I may have committed in past lives have taken the form of a large tumor on my spotted tail. In an attempt to right my wrongs, I have converted to the Amish faith, but I am afraid my efforts are in vain as the syphilis has gotten worse. What do you think I should do, o great and powerful tree dwelling rodent? Cheers, and remember, YOU WALK WITH A LIGHT STEP!!! YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS!!! YOU ARE STRONG!!! YESS IT IS RIPPED TO BE IN A BODY! SHOOTING A BALL OF WHITE LIGHT AT YOU RIGHT NOW <3

    • MEpearl

      Trying to parse your reality, Maurice. Syphilis is a physical condition not a moral one. Reptiles can be susceptible. Converting to the Amish faith is not going to right a single wrong. But you know all this. What are you really reaching for, Maurice?
      Your P.

      • MAURICE

        Hello Again P,
        Thank you for your thoughtful answer. I agree, converting to being Amish was a move intended to distract me from my current reality. I have taken a lot of time to think about your question, what am I really reaching for, and the only true answer that I can come up with is that I’m searching for meaning. I’m not quite sure what my purpose is in this world (although it’s seeming more and more like a simulation gone wrong), and having no path or passion is leaving me feeling lost. Do you have any tips for putting me back on track?
        Yours, Maurice.

        • MEpearl

          Your desire to get back on track suggests you have already been on the right track and in line with your purpose. Go back and reclaim your purpose and then change tracks. The purpose is not the problem. The path has been too circuitous. Eye on the prize!
          Pearl Loves You

  69. Joanna Fern

    Hi Georgette and Pearl,
    I’m a USC MFA film student and I would love the opportunity to discuss putting together a short documentary about your relationship! I love your channel, and would love to hear if you’re interested in collaborating!
    Let me know! Thanks,

    • MEpearl

      Thank you for your interest, Ms. Fern. Not at this time.

  70. Cheetah Chrome

    Oh bushy tailed Seer of all, please allow me to be enlightened with your boundless knowledge. The woman I love is hesitant to open up to me completely, about her thoughts and feelings for fear of me being like her former suitors who would ridicule and torment her because of her thoughts. I humble as that you would advise her as of what she should do.

    • MEpearl

      Dear Cheetah Chrome~
      She doesn’t need my advise, you do. Stay out of her personal thoughts and feelings. She’ll tell what she wants you to know when she wants you to know it. Respect her boundaries. Back off and lighten up.
      Your Pal, Pearl

  71. Sally

    Oh Pearl. I have just been introduced to your wisdom and am now your utter disciple. However I am from England and pronounce your blessed breed as squih-rull- two distinct syllables and not squwerl like your American host says. Is this offensive to you oh wondrous squih rull? Do you like the Brits?

    • MEpearl

      Love the Brits and prefer your sound. Think I’ll make (um, encourage) Georgette to adopt it. Squih rull. Yes!

  72. Opie

    Oh wise one, as an opposum, I wonder how to train a human. She took really good care of me and my brothers and sisters. They opted to leave, but I felt she has potential. I love her meals, especially the grapes, eggs, yogurt, fruit, and some of her vegetables, but we seem to be at a stalemate regarding regarding my delightfully aromatic excrement. Do you have any advice how I can make my gifts as appreciated as they deserve?

    • MEpearl

      Dear Opie,

      You would enjoy a shallow roasting pan of tepid water remaining in the same place. Like a litter box but with water. Soon you will find comfort in depositing your gifts in this easy to clean manner. You’re welcome. P

      • Opie

        Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom!! I am absolutely amazed at my human’s excitement and delight in finding my aromatic gifts in my new offering pan!! Humans are a very curious species indeed!!
        Much love to you-
        Opie Opposum

  73. Joel

    Hey, MEpealA!; Keep on Rockin’ in the Free World! Love your Posts. Very Genuine.

  74. Blanche Blacke

    Hello. My name is Blanche. I have my Chakra Shoppe in Chicago. I would love to have you as a guest for one of our quarterly spirit fairs . I love nature so much. Your videos inspire me. Contact me. Let’s talk. Namaste

    • MEpearl

      Hello Blanche~ It’s difficult for ME to materialize. Even at a spirit fair folks tend to disrespect squirrels. Cela n’en vaut pas la peine, But we send all blessings to your enterprise. P de W

  75. Dee Dee Megadoodoo

    Great Mystic Pearl, All-Knowing and Ever Present, who are you voting for this year?

    • MEpearl


  76. Spirah Gandy

    Dear you, Pearl,

    I just started going back to school after a long while, and I am overwhelmed by the amount of work and stress it is causing me. My question is, do you have any study tips or coping tips, and do you believe I can do it!?<3


    • MEpearl

      Dear Spirah~ I’m not the Rah! Rah! You can do it! type of squirrel. Of course you CAN do it but that is not the issue. Stress is the issue and figuring out how to reduce it to manageable. Something must be eliminated or postponed. Yes, THAT! You know exactly what can go or wait. Do yourself a favor and downsize.
      This may mean putting your kids up for adoption. No one will criticize you for making a brave decision.
      Your Pal Pearl

  77. nathan

    Pearl, my best friend and old roommate has been shipped overseas to Bahrain. Do you have any advice for someone who lives far, far from home and in a completely different culture than they’re used to?

    • MEpearl

      Care packages and continuing communication. Be willing to listen to everything. An opportunity for mutual growth if you keep processing.
      Pearl the Omniscient

  78. Sabrina

    Can I book you to perform a speech at my best friends wedding in June?

    • MEpearl

      Yes, but it would be a mistake since I see little hope for couples starting out these days. P.

  79. Lily

    Does the colour green deserve to exist?

    • MEpearl

      If it didn’t it wouldn’t. Pearl de Wisdom Eternal

  80. Kenneth Tussey

    You are so amaizing and funny I watch every post even though I’m stealing someones email and address and name!

  81. Annie

    Blessed day Pearl the Squirrel, two of your kin live in my yard and they are always chasing and arguing with each other. I don’t think they are trying to mate it really seems like they dislike each other but neither want to leave my little oasis paradise. Any idea what I can to to help them get along? You’re the only squirrel I can ask!

    • MEpearl

      Hi Annie~
      Tis the nature of squirrels to be querulous. Same dynamics in Georgette’s back 40. Squirrels just wanna have fun. Youngsters can play rough and oldsters get even rougher, especially during mating season. Keep an eye out for injuries. Otherwise just lean back and enjoy the paradise you created.
      Your Pal Pearl

  82. Michael

    Should I kill myself in the woods so the possums eat me?

    • MEpearl


  83. Transcendental Dust

    Greetings Enlightened One,
    I very much enjoy you’re unique outlook, and efforts to keep us safe from bad aliens(and governments). Are there “good” extraterrestrials and can I meet them?

  84. Sigismund

    Dear Pearl,
    Sometimes when i go to the forest for a walk i see squirrels. Can i feed them carrots? I breed carrots in my yard and i have too many of them. Thank you.

  85. Landon

    Dear Pearl,

    This year has started out on the wrong foot with so many tragedies continuing to happen. Along with tragedy, comes a great sadness that taints the hearts and minds of many people out there, especially todays youth. Its this sadness that truly permeates our souls; therefore, showing itself through our music, media, and our day-to-day lives. What would you recommend as a remedy to this insurmountable depression that captivates the world in which we inhabit? Is love and peace truly enough to save the lives of those who find life hopeless? When will life just be happy and meaningful for all again? If you have any answers to these questions, I would be most humbly grateful. If not, then to read a few sentences more of your wisdom would most efficiently suffice.

    Forever yours,

    • MEpearl

      Pull it in, Landon. Bring it home. What’s going on with YOU? Right now? You can talk to ME.
      Yours, Pearl de Wisdom.

  86. Elle

    Pearl, my love life sucks. My confidence is at an all time low. What is your advice to overcome heartbreak?

    • MEpearl

      Everybody’s love live sucks, Elle. Or is that just us? I lost my heart over bad boy Stockton du Pres and found it again with good boy and eventual betrothed Sam (the teeth) Camplese. Lean into the break. That’s where the light comes in. It may help you to listen to the songs of Leonard Cohen but, judging from your photo, probably not.
      Time is your friend and I am yours. Pearl

  87. Rose

    Dearest MePearl, I just discovered you today, and now my life goal is to be like you. Your beauty and confidence are radiating! How do I get to the point where I am happy with myself. Sincerely, Rose.

    • MEpearl

      You may wanna rethink this, Rose. I’m a dead squirrel. Sincerely, Pearl

  88. Sarah

    Oh mighty Pearl, my guidance in life. I have reached a dilemma only your brilliance can help me figure out. How does someone stay living through all the hardships life has thrown at them? Is there any recommendations or should the person just end the suffering?

    Many thanks

    • MEpearl

      Don’t quit before the miracle. You are reaching the point where you have nothing to lose. This is GREAT. This is the freedom to do what needs to be done. What makes you happy? Is it ‘too’ expensive? So what? Money doesn’t matter now. Is there someone who needs to know you love them? TELL THEM. Need to get away? Go to the movies and eat heavily buttered popcorn and milk duds day after day after day until it isn’t fun anymore. Do whatever it takes to keep going until your miracle arrives.
      Pearl loves you.

  89. Little T

    Pearl! What advice can you give me about working out! It’s so hard to establish a routine after work. All I want to do is sleeepppppppp.

    • MEpearl

      So don’t do it after work. Do it before. Or start simply on days off. I and my kind simply jump through the trees and it’s FUN. That’s the key, FUN. Do you like dancing? Find a dance class. A swim class, a boxing class, do agility with your dog!!!!! So many ways ‘working out’ can be FUN. Let ME know what you find. Your Pal Pearl

  90. mel

    no question; I think you are brilliant and clever!
    although I was attacked by a pet squirrel years ago, I don’t hate them.

  91. Noah C-H

    I have been very interested in your work for a while thanks for saving us all big is by the way big ups squirrel man I was wondering what the steps are to initiation into your church and also any tips for opossum care taking thanks. Regards Noah

    • MEpearl

      You’re in the church when I say you’re in the church and you’re in the church. Welcome! So mote it be.
      For tips on opossum care go to the home page of this site and type ‘reality check’ into the search box.
      The great and powerful P.

      • Noah C-H

        Hello almighty squirrel P. Noah here. I would like to have a more in depth opossum care step by step tutorial. I also have questions about your church. Is it possible we could skype or FaceTime Georgette at her earliest convenience? Thank you for welcoming me into your church.

        • MEpearl

          You are welcome to dine at the table of Pearl but keep in mind it’s a communal trough. Pearl loves you.

  92. diome

    Pearl, I need to seek your wisdom. There is a woman causing chaos in our life, one who is often referred to as “nuttier than a squirrel turd.” She believes in past lives and readings; any chance you could tell her to knock off the crazy?

    • MEpearl

      Dear Diome~
      You’ll have to do better than that. From where I perch it’s YOU who should knock off the crazy. Just sayin’. P.

  93. Saddened APearlstle

    Oh great and all mighty possom person, i come to you with great saddness, my girlfriend just left me after figuring out that i come to you for all my guildance and spiritual fullfillment. but to be frank, the true saddness is that she does not see your teachings like I do. dear Mepearl you are the Aplha and the Omega, the beginning and the end for your words are my commandment and i am so sorry that i have failed to convert those who are blind to your transcendent teachings. I will find a better suiter who understands the true meaning of sacrificing worldly pleasures for an eternal life under our great leader MEpearl.

    Bless you, and your work
    P.S. I have bought your merch so that you can continue your great and ever so wise teachings.

  94. Sophia

    how can i get clear skin without making a deal with the devil? can i make a deal with you?

    best regards,


    • MEpearl

      Dearest Sophia, You touch my little jackhammer heart.It’s not so easy making a deal with the devil. Usually a waste of time to even try.
      I’ll see what I can do, dear one. Meanwhile, you are beautiful.
      Pearl loves you~

  95. Chris

    I love what you’re doing. Please email me so I can help.

    • MEpearl


  96. Peanut

    Can you share with us your zodiac sign? I’m super curious haha

    Love ya!

    • MEpearl

      I can but I won’t for fear that it will mean something to you that’s inaccurate. I am SO MUCH bigger than the zodiac. We both are.
      Love ya!

  97. xXSquirrelLoverXx

    Greetings beloved squirrel goddess of Abraham.I reached out to you today, because I have an important question that only your guidance can assist me. I have spread the word of your good name, trying to get my close friends and family to believe in your teachings as well. However, they don’t nearly show the same passion to your cause than I. In fact, they were so distraught, my parents have kicked me out of their home.

    I beseech upon you to give me aid: how do I repair my relationship with my family while also guiding them towards the light of the benevolent MEPearl!

    I await your reply,
    Your loyal Champion

    • MEpearl

      Dear Loyal Champion~
      Me Pearl does not encourage evangelizing….ESPECIALLY to one’s parents.They will come to ME in their own time by their own path. Or not.
      Attempting to guide unwilling parents is a natural disaster. Return humbly, apologize, and LISTEN.
      Pearl loves you !

  98. Gabriel Ryan

    Good Morning Pearl,
    I discovered your channel at three o’clock this morning and I am now a true believer. I immediately bought two buttons for me and my friend, who is now also a faithful fan. My question for you, Pearl, is what comes after life? Will my human soul transcend to the level of consciousness that you, the omnipotent squirrel, has achieved?

    Gabriel Ryan

    • MEpearl

      Either that or your brain will explode. No way to predict.
      Your Pal Pearl

  99. Roblox Messiah

    “Can you ask me pearl for me how they overcame the hatred and backlash from the media? You express yourself so beautifully and I aspire to have the confidence like you one day. Can you give me some advice for the real world? I love you Me pearl. My best friend and I are huge fans. We hope to get a possum one day. P.s. we bought some of your merchandise we love it!!!.”

    • MEpearl

      You have come to ME, sacred dead squirrel, for advice about the real world? Clearly you need it.
      Tip #1, Seek out someone successfully navigating the real world. The Big P