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Shop ME Pearl!
I can’t eat fruit preserves anymore, but your squirrely magnetism draws me closer. I must be able to share preserves or spreads with a friend or two. Pardon me while I go to PayPal. HMVincent
Yes I do have squirrely magnetism, don’t I! Guess that’s why I’m so stuck on myself. HA HA hahaha hee hee yo yoyo hic hic. I’m so funny.
My parents were second cousins, that’s why I look so much alike. Haha hahahahhahfdash snerk! But seriously, I want to give your human servants a box of chocolates. Have your concierge send an email. Meanwhile, ’twas a chilly day for Willy when the mercury went down, and I gotta buy more T-shirts ‘n’ stuff. Yours faithfully,
You’re a funny one.
You’re sweet to offer chocolates but I don’t allow my human candy. You let something like that get started and they are begging for treats every time you turn around. But we sure want you to stay toasty warm and all the better with a picture of the beneficent ME smiling over your heart. The image of ME on the golden lily pad looks particularly fetching over kelly green.
Be Happy, Pearl Loves You
Dear Pearl,
Your store is not working anymore. This makes me very sad since I wanted to buy your beautiful items of clothing.
Is there any chance you might get it up and working again, or even make a new store where I can possibly buy a hoodie that shows the visage of the awesome Pearl of Wisdom? My heart cries out for an item of clothing to display my allegiance to the wise and mighty Pearl. Or perhaps even a shirt that displays the fact that I will never make moral judgments on an opossum.
Most Sincerely, Veronica
Yes, Veronica there is a Saint Pearl, who can transform all things including that crappy merchandising arrangement that no longer serves.
There will be a new store, a wondrous store, a store supplying all your wants at prices that will supply all of mine.
But Pearlie Mae’s paws are tied at the moment. Merchandising rights belong to one who has lost the faith. The great red and silver Goddess must be wooed and cajoled and possibly subsidized back into the fold.
Besides, wouldn’t you like to lose a few pounds before wearing a big bulky hoodie?
There is a time to every purpose under ME, Pearl.
Dear Pearl, what if I have no money and am dead broke but still want to send you a gift? Can I mail you an offering of peanuts or something?
Sincerely, Veronica
Where can I purchase a ME T-shirt or ME Idol poster. I worship you.
Thank you for worshiping ME. You are an old soul; wise even beyond your incarnations. It’s good to have tangible reminders of ME and you are right to want them. Sadly there is no product line as yet but we are working on it. Meanwhile, hold ME in your heart and mind and meditate on ME daily. Whenever in doubt ask yourself “What would Pearl do?” This should hold you until there is a t-shirt.
Your idol, PEARL
pearl, please please please use your almighty powers to get the store up again. have been trying to buy the possum hoodie for years
O.K., Pearl is moved. An opportunity to possum-shop shall be put into place once Mercury goes direct.
Thank you for your interest. Your persistence shall be rewarded.
Entrepreneurially Pearl
I love you Pearl please make beautiful merchandise again so that I may spread the word of your godliness to strangers on the street
Pearl loves you, too, Nicky. That’s why I must warn you against thinking about stuff stuff stuff rather than ME ME ME. ME. Merchandise is fleeting whereas I am eternal. Besides my dumb human hasn’t been able to figure out this store thing yet.Maybe soon. Maybe not. Meantime, ME ME ME
Forever Pearl