ASK PEARL

Posted By: Admin on April 6, 2010 in - Comments: 942 Comments »

 

Let ME Explain!

 

THIS is where you have the opportunity to find the *truth from ME, Pearl of Wisdom!

* or a facsimile thereof (because, Mesdames et Messieurs, YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH. ha hahaha hee hee ..hic hic hic, Pearl of Wisdom is sooo funny!)

Pearl of Wisdom absolves herself of any and all responsibility for whatever may go terribly terribly wrong as a result of taking her advice.

Please note that your personal privacy is of no interest to Pearl.

Thank you for writing in and have a nice day.

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942 Blessed Comments

  1. Avatar Your true love says:

    Dear Pearl,
    what do you think about de’pression? I have been struggling for a few years. nothing seems to help. medication is failing me. I want to be a possum because they have short lives. please help.
    sincerely,
    sadboi in seattle

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      I feel ya, bro. Psychic anchors on every limb and a brain filled with porridge and quills. Pearl knows. Pearl cares. Let the fact that you are not a possum be an elfin light on your dreary mindscape. You say medication is failing you, not that it has failed you. Keep trying. Don’t give up before the miracle. Sending you tons of happy woo woo. Pearl loves you. (Fat lotta good that does, right?)

  2. Avatar Dalloway says:

    Dear Pearl,
    How are you? What do you expect for the next year? Do you have any plans for christmas?
    I hope you have a good time. Your videos bring love and hapiness to my life. Thank you! See you, xx.

  3. Avatar Havana says:

    hi pearl,
    i think youre really awesome, and i want to know, what do you think happens when we die? since you are a dead squirrel, and all knowing, i figured you may have some insight to this question!
    thank you, blessed be and i love u

  4. Avatar sad sam says:

    hi pearl I recently lost a dear freind/brother/soulmate/rat/loaf and since you are all knowing I was wondering how I can get over this great loss thank you pearl
    ps. is this a religion if so I would like to join

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      You will never get over this great loss. Nor should you. You are forever changed. That’s love for ya. This IS a religion and you’re in, Sam. Welcome.
      Pearl loves you.

  5. Greetings,
    You are wonderful. Please contact, we wish to have you on our Friday night program! Will you bring the joy of Pearl to FreeSpeechTV? Can the Pearls of Wisdom manifest amongst the punk-right of the internet? We need you. We are not worthy.

  6. Avatar Linda says:

    Pearl, I think I’ve met my soulmate, the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. What are some creative ways to express love?

  7. Avatar Lauren says:

    O graceful leader Pearl, my boyfriend has a really bad haircut and doesn’t know how to get himself fixed. Can you recommend a good haircut for men so I can look at him again? Thank you.

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Lauren, There are certain things Pearl just can’t work up any interest in. This is one of them. Good luck. Pearl loves you.

  8. Avatar shea says:

    hello pearl! i hope you are having a fine day. i need advice on thriving. how do you thrive? im sorta in a rut. thanks!

  9. Avatar jeff says:

    this kid keeps breathing on me and is giving me germs! my mother will get sick if he doesnt stop! Pearl please kill him!

  10. Avatar the alleys says:

    Hi Pearl. I hope you, Georgette, and the opossums and other squirrels are doing alright. Out of curiosity, are you bookable for events? My best friends and I adore your channel and we have some birthdays coming up and would love to meet you! 🙂
    peace and blessings,
    the alleys

  11. Avatar JadeDuck says:

    Hello Pearl,

    My family is looking to get another dog (both of ours passed last year, and we feel that it’s finally time for another one). However, we’ve moved into a more rural area and my father wants an outside dog who won’t scare off the opossums we have around the house. He likes to watch them run around the yard at night. Do you have any dog breed suggestions?

  12. Avatar Klara says:

    Dearest Pearl,
    I have just started college and seek advice on how to make friends. I am not shy, so approaching others is not the problem, but I am admittedly a bit strange, a bit of an oddball, if you will – in the best way, though (hopefully). How do I form meaningful connections without scaring people off with my sense of humour or having to pretend to be normal?
    In earnest and with love,
    a friendless friend-seeker

    • Avatar Klara says:

      Update: It has been 4 months and I have made 1 and a half friends.

      • Avatar Liwi says:

        Channeling ME Pearl’s infinite wisdom, may Pearl light so shine on your path: When it comes to friends, focus on quality, not quantity; send positivity to those who send positivity to you and also to those who don’t because only Pearl knows the inner struggle within the hearts of all; trust your gut – it may be Pearl sending you a message you should definitely listen to. love + light + Pearl, Liwi

  13. Avatar Callie says:

    Hey Pearl, how do you feel about the phrase, “Ok Boomer”? Best regards.

  14. Avatar sweet pea says:

    Greetings and salutations, Pearl. I was wondering, since you are a dead squirrel- can you talk to other dead animals? Other dead humans? Or is your communication only with your human representative. Thank you.

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dead, Living, and Not Yet Born. Sure I CAN talk to them but do I WANT to? Dead creatures tend to procrastinate and that makes them dull.
      Why do you ask, Sweet Pea? P

  15. Avatar Sierra says:

    Hello Pearl,
    Do you have any insight about how to be as great and perfect as you?

  16. Avatar Chonky Catto says:

    Dear Pearl,

    I have had a very difficult, traumatic life and just want to transform myself into something good that can change the world like you. How does one become a force for good when life is so hard Pearl?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Chonky Catto~ Your salvation is in your question. Your realization that a difficult traumatic life can propel you into being a force for good is the major obstacle overcome. BRAVA! Now, look to what you have learned that makes life easier and share that. Share your gems of experience. And always look for the funny. That’s the teaspoon of sugar that makes the medicine go down. Pearl loves you.

  17. Avatar Zachary says:

    Dear Pearl,
    My coworkers say that I’m wildly obsessed with opossums and that I should seek professional help. They’re often annoyed by me changing the backgrounds on the work computers to photos of them. How can I convince them that opossums are the cute and amazing creatures they are?
    Regards,
    “The weird opossum guy”

  18. Avatar Joseph says:

    Pearl,
    As a young man, I found a small, injured possum. I rescued it and nursed it back to health. In an effort to tear down the wall of enmity betwixt man and animal, I named it “Francis”. I chose that name because it was the only name that I knew of, as a seven year old, that worked regardless of the sex of the name. It regained its health and I returned it to the wild, never knowing if it was a boy or girl. Would you be a dear and ask around up there, I’m sure there aren’t many possums named Francis in the great beyond, and let me know if it was a boy or girl? Did it ever marry? Have a family? Eat dog food from a dog’s bowl while the dog slept?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Francis grew into a lovely lady opossum. Friends and family(that would be you) refer to her as Fran. She and innumerable descendants will be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge. What a joyous reunion that will be.
      Yours, Pearl

  19. Avatar Anxious in Arizona says:

    Hello Pearl!

    I’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety for a long time and have been on medication for nearly 5 years. Every once and a while (because I’m super forgetful) I’ll forget to take my meds, and often the day after next is awful. Do you have any tips for getting through bad days when everything feels cold and empty?

    Much love from Arizona!

    Ps: I hope that you, Georgette, and the other furry friends are doing well. Have a happy holiday season and happy new year!

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Anxious in Arizona,
      Pearl knows. Georgette has experienced what you describe. In Arizona, no less. Scottsdale and…wait for it….Sedona, one of the seven spiritual centers of the world. Still it felt like slogging through slow moving quicksand. Work through your resistance to the medication (you are not “super-forgetful”). Never underestimate the chemical component. Then find something that you consider more important than yourself and start supporting that, commit to that. Shift the focus away from yourself. Sometimes it’s necessary to do this while consuming a compensatory amount of spaghetti and cake. Pearl is with you 140 %.

  20. Avatar Jartmouth says:

    What are your thoughts on vaping? Love you squirrel friend

  21. Avatar Dion says:

    Hey Pearl, what are some of the best snacks for squirrels and opossums? Especially opossums. They come around my house every so often and I love the heck out of those cute little marsupials and want to sho them some love

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Dion, Grapes, shelled walnuts, almonds, apple, blueberries, strawberries, pumpkin, endive, persimmon, lightly steamed broccoli, carrots, …this works for both and the variety is healthier. Squirrels will prefer only nuts but don’t give in. Possums have a sweet tooth and will eat most anything but don’t give in. Think produce. Avocados are a big hit…in moderation. Good question!
      Your Pal Pearl

  22. Avatar Crystal Johnson says:

    Will Harry and Meghan make it?

  23. How much money makes Pearl happy? I am ready and waiting to give to you so that I can feel great!

  24. Dear Pearl. On behalf of the community house Possum Splendor, we humbly invite you and all your opossum friends to come over for an evening of yummy treats and warm drinks. We have some opossum friends here also, as well as raccoons that live in the top-top room( aka the 4th floor). We want to thank you for spreading the TRUTH and BEAUTY of OPPOSSUM! We also have a guest room available if you wish to stay for an extended period of time and shoot your Opossum videos. This could be a lovely Opossumability for all of us.

  25. Avatar DrMilfhunter says:

    Dear Pearl,

    Does my girlfriend really love me?

  26. Avatar Marian says:

    Hi, Pearl.
    I’m at an impasse in life. I am unsure how to continue on and whether or not to stay my current track or make a big change. What are your thoughts?

  27. Avatar Scotty Wilshire says:

    Hello pearl of the seas, o gracious one. I have crippling anxiety when ordering food in front of druids. What should I do? Also what squirrel is best for me? Thank you!

    Scotty, your faithful one

  28. Avatar Harley Davis says:

    Hello hope this finds you well. I live in a city and want to make a safe place for the opossum. Do you have any advice on care or helping them survive?

  29. Avatar John Doe says:

    Who is your favourite opossum celebrity? There are so many good potential answers.

    Kind Regards,

    Someone

  30. Avatar Defconairsoftersupreme says:

    Soy Holy Pearl , how can I achieve oneness with the great BB? Thanks

  31. Avatar Ann-Sofie says:

    Dear Pearl

    I was wondering if I could make a couple of possum illustrations based on your youtube videos.
    I would be making these for my college class of illustration!
    I’ve recently been really loving all the possum content out there!
    One more question, what would a possum’s favourite tea flavour be?

    Lot’s of love from Belgium,
    Ann-Sofie, a big fan of possums

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Ann-Sophie~
      Illustrate away! ‘Morning Thunder’ but it messes with the image. Go with ‘Hibiscus’.
      Lots of love to Belgium~
      P

  32. Avatar a paradoxical dragon says:

    Dearest Pearl,
    My grandmother died almost 8 years ago when I was a younger teen and I never had the chance to say goodbye to her before she died. In the years after her death, I have struggled and been diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety and learned about a family history of these afflictions which included my grandmother. I remember that when I was a child, she would often spend a lot of time in her bed alone, even when the whole family was at her house. My mom would always make us go upstairs to say hi to her before we went off to play and sometimes I would complain about having to go up and spend time with her instead of playing. Now that I am older and I understand why she spent so much time in her room alone, I feel immense guilt for not spending for time with her and viewing it as almost a chore since I know she loved having our company and that it probably helped her feel less sad and alone. Pearl, what should I do? I wishI could make up for the time I didn’t spend with her when she was alive.
    Since you’re the only dead (and psychic) squirrel I know, I figured you would be a good person to ask.
    From Russia with love,
    a dragon

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear dragon,
      It WAS a chore for you to upstairs to her, just as it would have been a chore for her to go downstairs to you. You were both doing the best you could. She feels guilty for not being the grandmother you needed and wants you to forgive her. You can do that, right?
      Pearl loves you

  33. Avatar Camesol says:

    Why Are There Acorns in My Garage?

  34. Avatar MACMcanada says:

    Hello beloved pearl, I am under a lot of stress due to school and I was wondering how do you deal with your stress?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      I eradicate the causes but then I’m Pearl and you are not. Drugs can be good. Find another school. Get a long haired kitten. That’s probably the best.
      Your Pal Pearl

  35. Avatar Aidan says:

    Hey Pearl, I was just wondering, what’s your favorite food?

  36. Avatar Sean says:

    If I happened to lose my beloved o-possum down the back of my fridge on a cold and rainy Wednesday night as I prepared such a scrumptious meal of greens for such a graceful specimen that an o-possum is, what would you recommend doing to get him out from behind the fridge? Obviously this hadn’t happened to me, of course, but in case such a thing did happen to me and my o-possum, what would you do to lure out the o-possum from behind the fridge?

  37. Avatar Ethan says:

    Hi pearl. How do you keep yourself motivated? Sometimes I feel like I have no direction in life. No passions. If I don’t know what I aspire to be, how do I keep the wheels that move me forwards turning?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Hi Ethan~
      Squeaky wheels get the grease. Ask for what you need and want. Get loud, if need be, even though it is not your nature. I stay motivated because I have a service to perform and lessons to teach and promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep. Aspire to be of service, Ethan. Opportunities abound. Plus it’s fun and feels good. Pearl loves you~

  38. Avatar Steve says:

    You seem to be knowledgeable about possums yet your calendar shows a squirrel. Is this a hoax, or does it have a hidden meaning? That is really my question about everything.

  39. Avatar Mary Wetterling says:

    Hello pearl. I love possums so much and have always wanted a pet possum. Or to at least hold one. I live in the suburbs of Chicago and do not know where I can find one to hold. Do you have any ideas of how I can hold a possum? If so please email me back. Thank you for your website and YouTube channel and give all your possums big hugs for me!!
    -Mary 🙂

  40. Avatar Angel says:

    Dear Pearl,
    My aunt recently passed and I feel rather hollow. I really want to know if she’s doing okay wherever she is now and if she’s proud of me and her daughter.

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Angel~
      Your Aunt is doing just fine and she’s very proud of you. Her daughter, on the other paw, needs some work and everyone in the family knows that.
      Love, Pearl

  41. Avatar SedonaVortex says:

    Greetings Pearl. Your work is fantastic and I’m lucky to have found it. Whats your skincare routine to keep that dead squirrel pelt so radiating?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      My skin and hair grew in luminosity after death sort of like a vampire but without all the creepy elements.
      Now it’s just a spritz of spring water, positive thoughts and an indomitable will for perfection. Thank you for noticing.
      Bet you’re pretty, too. P.

  42. Avatar YOUpearl says:

    Hello Pearl, I would love to know if Georgette Spelvin is a wildlife rehabilitator. Did she rehabilitate you?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Yes. Georgette became a wildlife rehabilitator in order to take care of ME. I taught her everything she knows and am still working on it. Thank you for asking. The Eternal Pearl

  43. Avatar Rowan says:

    Hi pearl! I just love all the work you do. I’m having trouble in my love life, I’m wondering how I can start accepting love from others and myself❤️

  44. Avatar Jim says:

    Dear Pearl,

    First, the squirrels of Lake Ola say hi (I think): “huh huh huh huh huh ahk! ahk!”

    The universe has been blessing me the past few months. I feel lucky, but don’t want to waste it on something selfish like a lotto ticket. My question is, what is the best way to share my luck?

    Oh, and the squirrels here don’t need luck. I already give them the big nuts in the bird seed.

    Cheers,
    Jim

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Just what you are doing, Jim. Talk about your good fortune. Remind the disenchanted ‘luck’ exists and shows up when least expected. Squirrels are cheer leaders and comforters. Whenever squirrels are around conditions are ripe for a miracle. P.

  45. Avatar Dominic says:

    Where did all the ancient civilizAtions go?

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Excellent question, Dominic. They didn’t actually GO anywhere. They are all around us waiting for a comeback. Yes, I know. Pearl

  46. Avatar Scorni says:

    Dear Pearl the omniscient,

    May I start off by saying what a shining coat you had in life and how your transcendence has smattered it in celestial stars!I adore what you do for your adoring following.

    My question is, do you mind telling your human meat puppet what a good job she is doing and what a magnificent person she is? I am sure she doesn’t need to know this and probably has a terrific grasp on it already, but regardless, we all need praise, and she is well deserving.

    Thank you for your divine blessings.

    Through nuts and claws, yours truly,
    ~Scorni

  47. Avatar Audrey says:

    Hi Pearl,
    You are an inspiration to the world. I hope you and the apostles are doing well.

    Audrey

  48. Avatar Esme says:

    O Beloved Pearl,

    I live in an area populated with many other squirrels, which are obviously inferior to You. However, I would still like to be friends with them. So, my question is, how do you think I can become friends with a regular, non-psychic squirrel?

    Thank you, O Magnificent Benevolence!

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Walnuts. But watch your thumb which can be mistaken for one. Update your tetanus shot and welcome to the love of squirrels. Pearl is happy.

  49. Avatar Phyllosaurus says:

    Pearl!

    Here’s what’s in my heart—-

    I LOVE YOU PEARL! YOU ARE SIMPLY THE BEST!

    I am also a small mammal rehab volunteer and social media manager. I tend to gravitate towards Racoons however. Do you think I am more suited to the fostering of Oppossums? What does Pearl see?

    love you love you love you dear spirit! You make this world soooooooo much better!
    Phyllosaurus
    Canada

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Phyllosaurus~
      Go where you gravitate but many small mammal rehabbers do both and several more. Learn everything you can. We also love the masked opossum, what you call raccoon.
      Thank you for the kind sentiments. Your Pal Pearl

  50. Avatar Kaeo says:

    Dear Pearl. In the last 18 days i’ve lost 4 people whom i’ve loved to the next life. Brandt and Katie were murdered who knows why. Kims habits finally caught up with here leaving 2 children behind. Worst of all Sarahs son (minor no names here but you know) was killed on his bike by a driver not paying attention. Its been hell but will you look after all 4 of them for me? I know its alot but I’d really appriciate it.

  51. Avatar Boo says:

    Hi Pearl,
    I just found your videos and I love them, you are so calming and wise.
    My question is, im gay in a homophobic family, how do I come out?
    Thank you so much,
    Love you!

  52. Avatar Possumparty says:

    What does “a sober possum is a social asset” really mean? I would love to know.

  53. Avatar Shannon says:

    Dearest exalted one,
    How do I ascend? I wish to do what you do, but with cats.

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Hi Shannon~
      I’ll tell you a secret; all I really do is try to keep a wayward human on track while balancing the rest of the universe. Introducing cats could only make this infinitely more difficult. But that’s just ME. Good luck.
      The exalted one

  54. Avatar Tim in NJ says:

    Dear Pearl: I have several grandkids and 2 of them live with my wife and I. They are highly allergic to both dogs and cats (those lower life forms) and I was wondering whether a member of your species or a magic marsupial would be a good pet/companion for a 9 and 11 year old.
    I know your species could teach young humans quite a bit philosophically

    Thank you and your kind

  55. Avatar Terezia says:

    does your omniscience converge unto only the pink vessel Or also the opossums whom she cares for? Your videos are amazing by the way. 🙂

  56. Avatar Sam says:

    Dear Pearl, I am eager to ask what your humans star sign is, would you be able to tell me? I love you

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      Dear Sam,
      I love you, too. But as a squirrel, I don’t care what my human’s star sign is and I don’t want you twisting her head with foolish notions. My control of her is shaky enough as it is.
      Pearl the Pragmatic

  57. Avatar Michael says:

    Dear Pearl,
    Do you have a valentine? Will you be my valentine? )Valentine’s Day is an earth holiday).
    Love,
    -Michael

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