Arts &Music

 

 

Make it one for my baby, and one more for the road…

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20 Blessed Comments

  1. Dear Pearl,
    Look at me representing Arts & Music. My name is Peach the Opossum and I sing tawdry torch songs. Plus I play classical piano. Flight of the Bumblebee is my signature. Just imagine it. I also twirl fire batons to the soundtrack of Hawaii Five-O. I’m special!

    Peach

  2. Harry (a BlueJay) says:

    OY – that’s all we need is more musical critters out there making a ruckus! In the spring I have to practically scream my wings off to get anyone to notice me above the ruckus from the Mockingbirds around here.

    And then those doves with there “lulu” songs that go on an on like a rapper on Quaaludes… What’s next? Finches with flutes?

    ~Harry
    A dignified Blue Jay

    • Pearl, Pearl, says:

      Pearl of Compassion does not like to be mean, Harry, but I know your kind. It’s birds like you who swiped my nuts and scared my friends. Plus, you ain’t no bluejay of happiness, yourself. You’re a scrub jay, Buster, and Pearl of Perception knows it. I come from a dove loving family who finds their songs melodelodelodelodious. Why not take your mind off sweet natural noises by dive bombing a cat?
      Whatever you decide to do, know that you cannot change anyone but yourself.
      So suck it up, Birdy, or migrate!
      Thank you for writing in and always remember, Pearl loves you.

  3. Harry (a BlueJay) says:

    NO NO NO you are very off base. I did not steal your nuts – you Squirrels are all alike, you bury nuts in the wrong places… I move them to better ones.
    Change myself?
    Me – what’s to change? I am amazing and wonderful and perfect… The Mockingbirds must change! The Dove’s should change but I doubt they have the capacity.
    Gotta fly – the sun is going down.

    • Pearl Pearl says:

      Harry, you are walking a dangerous guard rail, my friend. you are beginning to upset the Pearl of Peace and Placidity. Ommmm Ommmm.
      you forget yourself. you will offer something of artistic merit to this site or you will Flap Off!
      As for the strategic placement of nuts; claims are made by fools like thee, but only SQURLZ can make a tree.
      Your pearl has been cast. Go bury THAT you stupid scrub jay. Ommmm Ommmm

  4. Beany says:

    Dear Pearl,
    Your fan club wants you to go on ‘Dancing with the Stars’.
    What about it?

    Beany, treasurer, ME Pearl fan club

    • Pearl of the Dance Pearl of the Dance says:

      Hey there, Beany,
      Quelle bonne idee!
      Yes, I shall accept applications for those who crave to dance with ME, the star.
      I see ME wearing a risque peek-a-boo affair and you in a one piece agouti dance suit and understated fedora with P-E-A-R-L flashing across the band in neon rainbows.
      Just submit a photo, resume, and non refundable $75 processing fee to ME, Pearl of the Dance.
      Press the pretty little PayPal button to apply. Just think, Pearl may choose YOU. Multiple applications encouraged.
      ME of Terpsichory

  5. Fabio Florence says:

    Dear Pearl,
    I have had a sneaking suspicion for quite some time that my opossum is struggling with his sexuality. He has quite an affinity for my more fabulous clothing, as well as a strange fascination with our male cat. Dear Lorenzo is not the best at expressing his feelings, however, and I am afraid that if we don’t do something soon, the conflicting and sometimes confusing emotions he is dealing with will cause him to sink into depression. Please help me find a way to aide him in coming out, and coming to terms with his possible homosexuality.

    Your wisdom and guidance is much appreciated.
    Your friend,
    Fabio Florence

    • pearl pearl says:

      Dear Fabio,
      I doubt that Lorenzo is struggling. Gay possies have been a marsupial staple for eons. It’s your cat who will be struggling if Lorenzo decides to express himself amorously. Run kitty run!
      Pearl, who has seen it all

  6. M Evans says:

    When you ascended, did you see a light? Did you see your brothers and sisters? Was there a green forest full of oaks and acorns? Was there heavenly music? Was Elvis there?

    • pearl pearl says:

      Yes, yes, yes, yes, no.
      Elvis dances to his own drummer so he went to where his music is fully appreciated. He does bop by every so often for a rest cure. Making music can wear a person out, believe you ME.
      I make classical music, myself; on the djembe.
      Your Pal,
      Pearl de Wisdom

  7. gay whaleshark says:

    Hello

  8. Prof. Dr. Zahid A. Siddiqi says:

    Hello
    I am ascended Ferret in human form. would you be kind enough to offer your opossum massages to humans like myself? I got very excited by the tail massages..

  9. dangerous & contagious says:

    What do you use your funding for?

  10. Anya says:

    Dear Pearl,
    I’ve been struggling to find meaning in my career. I know what I want to do next, but getting there is difficult. Pearl, I know you were a real Carpe Dem Acorns squirrel, and I’m wondering if I should go out on a limb (you were on many!) even if it means making a lot less money. And talking to a lot more humans (right now I work alone into a computer). Humans are scary. Basically, Pearl, I’m wondering what thoughts got you through, and kept you on your wild and lovely path.
    Love and miss you!
    A

    • MEpearl MEpearl says:

      You are right, Laughing Radish, humans ARE scary. Is it an all or nothing operation? Must you be snatched up from isolation and hurled into the teeming fray?
      There’s an anxiety attack waiting to happen. Just sayin’. I will not advise you to go out on a limb, although it’s clearly what you want. A mortal once said to ME ‘Jump and the net will appear’. I did and it didn’t. Lucky I’m a squirrel. Your inner self is already in the process of transition.You have to go with it.
      But be careful and circumspect. Know that you are more sensitive than most which leaves you vulnerable to excess sensory and emotional input. Don’t be afraid to take care of yourself. It’s the bravest thing you can do.
      And, since you ask, it was easier for ME.
      Once I realized that I was the ultimate truth my way was clear. It was up to ME to encourage all creatures great and small to come to ME for guidance and succor. So I have and they do.
      Remember that Pearl loves you so what, of any import, could go wrong? Ha hahaha Hee hee hee hee O Ho ho hoho. Pearl made a funny.

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