Make it one for my baby, and one more for the road…
Tags: Arts & Music
Look at me representing Arts & Music. My name is Peach the Opossum and I sing tawdry torch songs. Plus I play classical piano. Flight of the Bumblebee is my signature. Just imagine it. I also twirl fire batons to the soundtrack of Hawaii Five-O. I’m special!
Pearl of Compassion can see that you are, indeed, …’special’.
OY – that’s all we need is more musical critters out there making a ruckus! In the spring I have to practically scream my wings off to get anyone to notice me above the ruckus from the Mockingbirds around here.
And then those doves with there “lulu” songs that go on an on like a rapper on Quaaludes… What’s next? Finches with flutes?
A dignified Blue Jay
Pearl of Compassion does not like to be mean, Harry, but I know your kind. It’s birds like you who swiped my nuts and scared my friends. Plus, you ain’t no bluejay of happiness, yourself. You’re a scrub jay, Buster, and Pearl of Perception knows it. I come from a dove loving family who finds their songs melodelodelodelodious. Why not take your mind off sweet natural noises by dive bombing a cat?
Whatever you decide to do, know that you cannot change anyone but yourself.
So suck it up, Birdy, or migrate!
Thank you for writing in and always remember, Pearl loves you.
NO NO NO you are very off base. I did not steal your nuts – you Squirrels are all alike, you bury nuts in the wrong places… I move them to better ones.
Me – what’s to change? I am amazing and wonderful and perfect… The Mockingbirds must change! The Dove’s should change but I doubt they have the capacity.
Gotta fly – the sun is going down.
Harry, you are walking a dangerous guard rail, my friend. you are beginning to upset the Pearl of Peace and Placidity. Ommmm Ommmm.
you forget yourself. you will offer something of artistic merit to this site or you will Flap Off!
As for the strategic placement of nuts; claims are made by fools like thee, but only SQURLZ can make a tree.
Your pearl has been cast. Go bury THAT you stupid scrub jay. Ommmm Ommmm
Your fan club wants you to go on ‘Dancing with the Stars’.
What about it?
Beany, treasurer, ME Pearl fan club
Hey there, Beany,
Quelle bonne idee!
Yes, I shall accept applications for those who crave to dance with ME, the star.
I see ME wearing a risque peek-a-boo affair and you in a one piece agouti dance suit and understated fedora with P-E-A-R-L flashing across the band in neon rainbows.
Just submit a photo, resume, and non refundable $75 processing fee to ME, Pearl of the Dance.
Press the pretty little PayPal button to apply. Just think, Pearl may choose YOU. Multiple applications encouraged.
ME of Terpsichory
I have had a sneaking suspicion for quite some time that my opossum is struggling with his sexuality. He has quite an affinity for my more fabulous clothing, as well as a strange fascination with our male cat. Dear Lorenzo is not the best at expressing his feelings, however, and I am afraid that if we don’t do something soon, the conflicting and sometimes confusing emotions he is dealing with will cause him to sink into depression. Please help me find a way to aide him in coming out, and coming to terms with his possible homosexuality.
Your wisdom and guidance is much appreciated.
I doubt that Lorenzo is struggling. Gay possies have been a marsupial staple for eons. It’s your cat who will be struggling if Lorenzo decides to express himself amorously. Run kitty run!
Pearl, who has seen it all
When you ascended, did you see a light? Did you see your brothers and sisters? Was there a green forest full of oaks and acorns? Was there heavenly music? Was Elvis there?
Yes, yes, yes, yes, no.
Elvis dances to his own drummer so he went to where his music is fully appreciated. He does bop by every so often for a rest cure. Making music can wear a person out, believe you ME.
I make classical music, myself; on the djembe.
Pearl de Wisdom
I am ascended Ferret in human form. would you be kind enough to offer your opossum massages to humans like myself? I got very excited by the tail massages..
Dear Professor Doctor,
Stay out of the lingerie drawer.
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